Friday, July 23, 2010

Recent Life

For some reason lately I have been feeling like this about my profession..A little down in the dumps you could say


The past few days I came through Utah on my way back from Idaho, to work my three quick shifts at Primary Children's before heading home. I wish I had all the time in the world to see my friends that I miss so much, but instead I have to be a grown up and work :( I am exhausted from a shift that seemed way too long, and I got off two hours early! I am so happy to be back in a nice clean hospital, I could kiss the ground of that place! I have been away from Shawn for over a week to work, and that is adding to my down in the dumps-ness. Unfortunately after 6 weeks of not working and enjoying my life in the pool TOO much, I found a place to make myself useful. Sadly enough, it is usually working nights in the Arizona state prison. Definitely in ALL aspects a 360 degree turn from daytime pediatric nursing. As much as I love primary's I feel like it has been good for me to be away from the comforts of the place I consider my nursing home.

I have been working in an all men prison-at first I was terrified, I'm serious. Since I have been going back I have met some very respectable men, and every time I see them turn to walk away from me and head back to their cells alone I try to imagine how in the world that must feel. When I make the hour drive home through the Arizona desert, I think about how grateful I am that people in this life have the opportunity to change. I also think every single mile about the fact that I am only.. ONLY..doing it for a paycheck.That's it.

Last week we got a break from work, school, the prison, everything and went to Idaho with my family. I love my family! We went jet skiing, canoeing, played games, and just hung out by the lake. To me, there is no place like Idaho. Who knows if life circumstances will bring us back for good someday, but until then I will just be so grateful every time I get to visit a place so beautiful!

We missed Emily and Josh this year, neither of them could come, but family outings are not the same if even one person is missing..they better come next year we sure miss all being together. I have been spoiled being around my mom so much, it's hard not to go through withdrawals.


Tonight I am lucky enough to babysit little Soph. She is sleeping in her swing with the chubbiest cheeks ever. Her little swing plays music that is so familiar to me from piano songs we were forced to practice growing up. It makes me miss all my sisters like crazy, and I can't believe one of them is old enough to have a little baby herself. I should include Josh in there, he contributed to the Allen music with his 6th grade trumpet skills.


We are moving back to Utah next month. Back to the University of Utah, back to Primary Children's full time. We will miss our time with Shawn's family we have had so much fun with them. We are excited to get back to the place where we started out as Mr. and Mrs. Allen.

Tonight I am realizing why I write on my blog. I started out exhausted and annoyed, and I am ending very grateful for the time I have had to think back about how good life really is. Tonight I am grateful for a job, even though I like to complain about how tired working makes me. I am grateful for both my family and Shawn's, we are so very lucky when we pause long enough to think about it. I am grateful for our family friends, who have reminded us of late of the purpose of family-right when we needed it. We have grown together and thought a lot about life as we prayed and still pray for their little girl. We love you Pat and Ash. Thanks for your example! I'm grateful for my family who let me intrude when I come up to work once a month, and I'm grateful that I get a little time alone with miss Sophie tonight and that she is being so well behaved. Life really is good for us..we just need to take more time to stop and remember :) Happy Summer!

7 comments:

  1. I do the same thing Ashley. I start out my posts feeling bad, then get it all out & realize I'm happy. It must run in the family. :) We miss you a ton. We won't be there when you get back to town, but will definitely see you on Monday! I'll enjoy the rodeo & fireworks in Snowflake for you. :) SO bummed you won't be there with us. Love you!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Despite your reasons for looking so tired and exhausted in that picture, that is proof of what a hard worker you are. Ever since I've known you, you have always worked hard at your studies and have always been a hard worker. This world is lacking in people who are dedicated to their work and enjoy being there. I look up to you in where you're at with your education and experience Ash. I'm still working on mine :) You are so cute and it looks like your family outing was fun! I love all your pics.
    Love, Ash

    p.s. How is your sis btw? Emily, is she doing ok?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Cute post! I barely ever look at blogs so I didnt even see this, but that is so cute! I love the picture of you and Soph in her Aunty pjs. Thanks for babysitting for us that was so nice! I am so excited you guys are moving here so close. Talk to ya soon!

    ReplyDelete
  4. ash I love your cute blog, I just am so excited for you to come back to utah and be my buddy!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I just love love reading your blog!! I do feel bad for you that you have to keep making those long drives back and forth.... I'm tellin ya we all just need to be rich and own airplanes! But you guys are just so cute! don't be sad about your job I bet all of your patients just love to see your happy smiling face every day!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I too LOVE reading your blog. Nathan and I recently went home to rexburg and was able to stay a week. And you are right... idaho is the best. We'd be blessed to someday end up there! I am glad you ahd such a fun time with your fam. Your life seems busy.... but sooo good and thats good to hear!

    ReplyDelete
  7. WAIT!!! Before you move back to Utah we have to visit! Call me! 480-861-1986

    ReplyDelete